My Story

What to say - What to do

Written by chrisevo

My mother passed away in 2008 and at the same time my father was diagnosed with Dementia. They were living on the Central Coast NSW where dad remained after mums death. Unfortunately dad was never one able to prepare a meal and came form the old school of just working hard and handing over the money to mum to manage. He sought solace in the locals clubs in the area for company, meals and for that drink or 2! The year following mums death has been extremely difficult as my brother and I have received several calls from neighbours, hospitals and even strangers telling us that dad has had too much to drink and has ended up in a predicament. he would call and say that "someone" had either stolen something from his home or his car. The car was always found at one of the local clubs. It finally got too much for my brother and I and we finally convinced my dad to return to Sydney where we could be closer to him and find him a retirement village of his choice. We sold his car as we were terrified of his drink driving. We have now found a wonderful complex for dad and he is in transition between my brother and my home until settlement. We are still quite worried about his drinking though as seems to levitate towards a club whenever he can. Dad being a small person only needs 3 drinks before he shows signs of personality changes to the detriment of all - neighbours and family. Whilst he doesnt drink all the time, we are still nervous wrecks waiting for that phone call to tell us one thing or the other. We can only hope that once he is settled at the new retirement village surrounded by others his same age (85) that we might get some respite and hear those famous words from dad " I wish I had come here years ago!!".
Chris