living a day at a time
A page in the diary "Sue's thoughts on life"
Written by suew Monday, 28 December 2009 22:36
I am sitting here crying, I just looked at the two photos I posted in the Gallery. It is not a good idea to look back when you are looking after someone with dementia. It is better not to think of the way things were last year or how they will be next year, it is better to just concentrate on today and live one day at a time.
Today was a good day as was yesterday. On both Christmas Day and Boxing Day I had to clean Ray up just after five o’clock. He doesn’t cope well with different foods to what he usually eats and meals at different times to what he is used to. No wonder so many households run like the trains, right on schedule. It is the routine that seems to be our saving grace so times like now when there is no routine are far harder to deal with.
There has been no-one to chat to on this site for a while now. 38 people have read my last diary entry, so where do those 38 people come from? Why did they read what I wrote but not sign up on the site and post a diary entry or come to chat? Are they/you afraid to participate for some reason? It is not scary; support is a good thing, to give and to receive. Without support I would not be able to go on caring for Ray.
If you are reading this why don’t you register and come and support the people who so need help? Tell us about the person you are caring for, how you do it day by day, what support systems you have and how that came about. If you are a dementia worker tell us about that, what you do, how you feel about it, maybe give us some tips for caring for our loved ones. This is a good site and as an Australian site could do with some new members to make it a worthwhile place to come to.
Sometimes I feel so lonely, not so much during the day but this time of a night when the world goes quiet. I know I can watch some tv, pick up a book, listen to music, all that helps but not a lot, once Ray goes to bed I have no-one to talk to, I am virtually alone. I go onto the Facebook site and see all the “friends” I have listed busy playing Bejewelled or being a good neighbour in Farmville. We deal so well with fantasy, but not so well with real life.
Tomorrow will be another day of looking after Ray “for richer, for poorer, for better for worse, in sickness and in health” etc. One day at a time is all I can do.