hopefully a solution to Ray's pain
A page in the diary "Sue's thoughts on life"
Written by suew Saturday, 26 June 2010 16:55
Ray had a needle into his lower spine on Friday. This is supposed to take away the pain, I hope so as we have both had a lot of sleepless nights. The full bone scan revealed a lot of old fractures and bone bruises on his ribs, shoulders and spine and some lower back damage. This is from all the falls, he had five in a fortnight at the beginning of June. The pain down his left leg is assumed to come from that period.
I cancelled all our outside activities last week to concentrate on getting all the medical appointments lined up to get to the bottom of this as quickly as possible. No Daycare for two weeks and no Scallywags as he has to walk in so only my base rate of five hours care this week too. I am really not coping well at this level of support and as soon as Daycare is back I am going to add Thursday Daycare to his routine.
Ray is high-care now with all his physical and mental problems and I can’t seem to get through to him that there is no staff here just me so if he drops something or spills something or makes a mess in the bedroom, bathroom or toilet he just walks away from it. The first time I know is when the smell hits my nostrils. I know others have that same problem.
If possible I still go to the dementia support group. I rang the NSW Carers but played phone tag with them all last week so will wait till I have some free time to ring them again. I was hoping they could tell me how to get more care. The local Carers meeting is on a Thursday so maybe by having Ray at Daycare on Thursdays I will be able to catch up with them too.
There is not a lot more I can do for Ray now. He still enjoys shopping as long as it includes a mug of hot chocolate and doesn’t mind lunch out although he has a small appetite and we often share a dinner. He has however lost a lot of interest in friends and family lately. I do feel as if I am dragging him along to family events against his will now.
When this is over I wonder if I will be able to resume old friendships or if they are gone for good? Eleven years as a carer has changed me as a person, in some ways for the better if older and wiser counts, but in a lot of ways I will never be the light hearted person I was in 1990 when Ray had his first stroke and life changed for us forever.