Spouses/Partners

The role of spouse or partner changes. The role of spouse/partner includes being the best friend, companion and sex partner, it includes close physical and emotional relationships. The person you shared life's good and hard times with will increasingly need help. Thus, parts of the role of spouse/partner will be replaced by a carer role where the one partner takes on an increasing number of functions and tasks in everyday life.

Dementia may cause you to experience a loss of ‘closeness’ to the person with dementia. The spouse/partner will feel the change in daily companionship the most. It can be difficult to maintain equality in the marriage or relationship over the long term when one person takes over and handles the other person's needs and interests.

Younger couples may also feel "cheated" in addition to experiencing loss as described above. Most have some expectations for the future which have dramatically changed. Thus, life can suddenly feel meaningless and empty because there are things you may realise you will never achieve together.

• Talk with your spouse about what you want to do while you are able to do so.
• Try to live as before and use the abilities the person with dementia still has.
• Seek out information about dementia; stay updated on what is happening with regard to management.
• Relative support groups can be used to share difficult thoughts and feelings with people in the same situation.