making decisions
A page in the diary ""
Written by suew 25. Apr 2008 04:48 AM
I just read a blog on Strokenet in which the poster questioned the decisions she and her family made to keep her husband alive four years ago. He is now a high care patient and because he is an intelligent man in a disabled body questions her constantly: "why didn't you let me die?".
We can all with hindsight see the decisions we made with our loved ones and know that they were not perfect. I wonder if it would have made a difference to Ray seven years ago if I had fought to get his driver's licence back and maybe given him (and myself) more freedom. Instead I saw all the risks involved and decided that the doctors were right and his driving days were over.
As Ray deteriorates in health and abilities I will start questioning if it is time to put him into permanent care. I know my decision will be half-right. Hey! I am a flawed human being,I don't have a crystal ball and will just make the best decision I can based on what I know about my ability to cope and Ray's condition at the time.
I know people on here question the decisions they have made. It is human to do so. Some of you are undermined by other members of the family who want to make the decisions but do not want to participate in the hands-on caring. I just hope we all make decisions on another's behalf with the best interests of our loved ones at heart.